Becoming apParent

The last four days have moved in slow motion. This new pregnancy is interesting. For those of you with more than one offspring, you will understand: I'm forgetting about it and yet at the same time, it has still absolutely changed everything. I guess I have more going on in my personal life this go around to be so engrossed in looking at pregnancy websites and all that. Plus, I've been there done that. But there is still a "wow" factor. This go around, I will be giving birth at a birthing center in SC. I'm very excited :)

Quick run-through of my labor with John: water broke at 1:42AM on 12.18.10 after 1.5 hours of sleep (trying to hoist myself off the couch on my first nightly trip to the WC). Steady contractions. Called the hospital. They suggested I come in. Contractions slowed. (because I knew I wouldn't be in the privacy of my own home for most of my labor?? I think so) Got to the hospital at around 5AM. Contractions had completely stopped by 9AM. Started pitocin AKA the demon drug at 10AM. Prayed and breathed and focused and Prayed and commanded my body to open. Hit transition at 4PM (God had told me to make it to 4PM so I had refused any pain-killers) John entered the world at 4:39pm on that snowy beautiful glorious December day with a full-head of dark hair. I had a dream a few days prior where I saw a dark-headed baby and thought wow that can't be MY baby since I had super light hair and Michael has auburn hair. God had given me a sneak peak. (super)Natural childbirth with no pain-killers and crap-load of pitocin and even more prayer, on my part and so many others! It was absolutely a spiritual experience like none other. Painful? yes. Beautiful? absolutely. Makes me wonder what this new baby's story will be. And at a birthing center, too! It will be unique, for sure.

In preparation for the actual cost of using a birthing center, I will be creating lots of fun crafts the next several months. We will have a Craft & Cookie Fundraiser (I just made that up...) closer to this kid's arrival.

In other news, I have been reading "The Strong-willed Child" by Dr. Dobson lately and it has really encouraged me on how to preserve my son's firey spirit while teaching him joyful obedience in love. I'm looking forward to this next pivotal year with him. I feel a lot more equipped to begin this new stage of our lives together. It won't be without challenges, I know. God has given so much grace for our first child, our little guinea-pig. We're gonna make mistakes. But it's gonna be good. Terrific, not terrible, Two's! :)

Here's a list of scriptures I used to mediate on during labor:

• The name of the Lord is a strong tower. The righteous runs into it and is safe. Proverbs 18:10
• Surely He bore our griefs and carried our sorrows... He was pierced for our transgressions. He was crushed for our iniquities. His chastisement for our PEACE fell upon Him. By His stripes, we are healed. Isaiah 53:4,5
• Christ has redeemed us from the curse of the law, having become a curse for us... in order that in Christ Jesus the blessing of Abraham might come to the gentiles, to recieve the promise of the Spirit through faith... If you belong to Christ then you are Abraham's descendants and heirs to the promise. Galatians 3:13,14,29 (I also suggest reading Supernatural Childbirth by Terry & Jackie Mize)
• This is the confidence we have that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us in whatever we ask, we know we have the requests which we have asked from Him. 1 John 5:14,15
• Perfect love casts out fear. 1 John 4:18
• God has not given us a spirit of fear but rather a spirit of POWER LOVE and a SOUND mind. 2Timothy 1:7
• His grace is sufficient for me.
• Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest, so is my Beloved. In His shade, I took great delight and sat down and His fruit was sweet to my taste. Song of Songs 2:3
• Those who wait for the Lord will gain new strength. They will mount on wings like eagles. They will run and not get tired. They will walk and not become weary. Isaiah 40:31
• Upon you I was cast upon birth. You have been my God from my mother's womb. Psalm 22:10
• "Shall I bring to the point of birth and not give delivery?" says the Lord... "Behold I extend peace to her like a river." Isaiah 66
• Blessed be the Lord who daily bears our burdens, the God who is our salvation. Psalm 68:19
• He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside quiet waters. He restores my soul. Psalm 23:2,3

The most profound revelation I had during labor was this: Jesus Christ went through so much suffering and even greater shame on our behalf. The King of Heaven, the Beautiful One, nailed to a cross like a common criminal. Beaten. Flesh torn. Spat on. Mocked. Labor was the single most painful experience I have ever had. But there was no shame. It felt like a privilege to share in His suffering without shame. It gave me great strength.